(no subject)
May. 20th, 2019 12:59 pmThis had been a particularly difficult one and Marcus is very, very tired.
After Chicago, after the Rance family and after his excommunication, Marcus had wanted nothing more than to be alone for a time. To find somewhere to hole up and lick his metaphorical wounds, but Tomas had wanted so badly to be taught and while Marcus hadn't been sure of it, hadn't thought it an entirely good idea, he'd taken the risk.
It's one he regrets now. He should have remembered he works better on his own. Men like Tomas are impossible, they think witnessing an exorcism or two makes them an expert and then they take risks. They're foolish. Tomas had let that demon in and Marcus had forced himself to walk away. Again. He'd sent Tomas back to Chicago, furiously instructing him to never get close to another demonic possession unless he wanted to be the next to die, and then he'd driven off in their rental truck without looking back.
So he's on his own now. Just like he had wanted. He hears from Bennett often enough to keep himself working, makes a bit of extra money taking odd jobs when God doesn't need him, because God's not going to pay for him to eat or find him a place to sleep.
Every so often he considers looking up the few friends he still has. There aren't very many of them and he's not sure how many would be happy to see him, but at the end of it all, he knows he's only considering it because of one friend in particular.
It's been ten years since he first met Dan Torrance, a man at his absolutely lowest point, and Marcus can't pretend even now that he hadn't been utterly taken with him at the time. But it had been wrong. Between the alcohol abuse and the fact that Marcus was a priest, it had been better to keep his distance, especially after one ill-advised kiss he hadn't been able to resist.
They've seen each other here and there over the years. Kept in touch. It does Marcus good to know that Dan is doing better, that he's staying sober. But he's still been a priest and so he's kept a bit of distance between them despite the memory of Dan's warmth, how good he'd been even at the worst point of his life. How steady he'd made Marcus feel. An exorcist needs to detach himself from everything that might be used against him and that includes friends. It especially includes anything that might bloom into something deeper and more meaningful.
But now, at this moment in this crappy hotel room, Marcus is thinking about him. He's only half awake, exhausted from the toll this most recent exorcism has taken on him both physically and mentally, and the thoughts of Dan aren't entirely coherent. Very nearly dreams. He thinks of that kiss, fleeting as it had been, and then his mind turns it into something else, something more.
As he slips into a restless, troubled sleep, the dream becomes worse. Dan's eyes go orange, that beautiful pale blue shifting to reveal another, second iris. But still he's trying to kiss Marcus, trying to lay him down on the bed, and Marcus goes, because if a part of him hasn't been a little bit in love with Dan Torrance all these years, then he's not sure he'll ever really know what love is.
The dream grows dark, slips into something else, something unrelated, and Marcus mumbles in his sleep. Calling Dan.
After Chicago, after the Rance family and after his excommunication, Marcus had wanted nothing more than to be alone for a time. To find somewhere to hole up and lick his metaphorical wounds, but Tomas had wanted so badly to be taught and while Marcus hadn't been sure of it, hadn't thought it an entirely good idea, he'd taken the risk.
It's one he regrets now. He should have remembered he works better on his own. Men like Tomas are impossible, they think witnessing an exorcism or two makes them an expert and then they take risks. They're foolish. Tomas had let that demon in and Marcus had forced himself to walk away. Again. He'd sent Tomas back to Chicago, furiously instructing him to never get close to another demonic possession unless he wanted to be the next to die, and then he'd driven off in their rental truck without looking back.
So he's on his own now. Just like he had wanted. He hears from Bennett often enough to keep himself working, makes a bit of extra money taking odd jobs when God doesn't need him, because God's not going to pay for him to eat or find him a place to sleep.
Every so often he considers looking up the few friends he still has. There aren't very many of them and he's not sure how many would be happy to see him, but at the end of it all, he knows he's only considering it because of one friend in particular.
It's been ten years since he first met Dan Torrance, a man at his absolutely lowest point, and Marcus can't pretend even now that he hadn't been utterly taken with him at the time. But it had been wrong. Between the alcohol abuse and the fact that Marcus was a priest, it had been better to keep his distance, especially after one ill-advised kiss he hadn't been able to resist.
They've seen each other here and there over the years. Kept in touch. It does Marcus good to know that Dan is doing better, that he's staying sober. But he's still been a priest and so he's kept a bit of distance between them despite the memory of Dan's warmth, how good he'd been even at the worst point of his life. How steady he'd made Marcus feel. An exorcist needs to detach himself from everything that might be used against him and that includes friends. It especially includes anything that might bloom into something deeper and more meaningful.
But now, at this moment in this crappy hotel room, Marcus is thinking about him. He's only half awake, exhausted from the toll this most recent exorcism has taken on him both physically and mentally, and the thoughts of Dan aren't entirely coherent. Very nearly dreams. He thinks of that kiss, fleeting as it had been, and then his mind turns it into something else, something more.
As he slips into a restless, troubled sleep, the dream becomes worse. Dan's eyes go orange, that beautiful pale blue shifting to reveal another, second iris. But still he's trying to kiss Marcus, trying to lay him down on the bed, and Marcus goes, because if a part of him hasn't been a little bit in love with Dan Torrance all these years, then he's not sure he'll ever really know what love is.
The dream grows dark, slips into something else, something unrelated, and Marcus mumbles in his sleep. Calling Dan.